Catskills. February 23, 2021. Kenoza Hall.
It started off like any other Kaplan vacation - postponement, looming cancellations and sickness.
Flashback to last week. Tzvi and I were supposed to go to the Catskills for one night (Wednesday night). On the preceding Sunday we checked the weather and everything looked clear. Then we checked again on Monday and suddenly a big storm system had shifted and the Catskills were slated to get 6-8 inches of snow on Thursday, meaning that while we would make it to the Catskills on Wednesday, we likely wouldn’t make it home on Thursday (which sounded fine to me, honestly). Anyway, Tzvi called the hotel and moved our reservation to Tuesday night of this week, which was supposed to have better weather.
Fast forward back to Tuesday morning. We woke up excited and ready to go on our overnight getaway, which is when we saw this text message from my mother: “Dad went for covid flu tests. 101 in the night.” Oh joy. First of all, my father is two weeks past his second vaccine, so if he does get Covid he’s going to be a medical marvel. But a positive flu test would likely mean that our babysitters would be out of commission, which would be bad. We decided to proceed with packing up anyway, assuming that everything would come back negative and he was likely just suffering from stress induced sickness from the impending sleepover. So we packed up and got ready to go, and thankfully we were right (he was negative on all accounts (physically and mentally)).
We got on the road around 10am, making a quick stop for coffee and avocado toast. The weather was beautiful and sunny when we left, but the weather had turned gloomy and rainy by the time we hit the Mario Cuomo Bridge (formerly the Tappan Zee Bridge, which by the way, looks way too sleek and modern to be named after an oldschool Italian like Cuomo; it would be more fitting as the Anderson Cooper Bridge). By the time we hit Sullivan County there was pretty messy snowfall, but we still made it to our hotel on schedule. The most exciting part of the drive was seeing a billboard for Honors Haven. For those unfamiliar with that “vacation,” let’s just say it was memorable.
Kenoza Hall opened in Summer 2020. The hotel is housed in a grand old house on Kenoza Lake. The house was built in the early 1900s and served as a boarding house/hotel until it was turned into a private residence in the 60s; it was bought by this small upstate hotel group in 2017 and they spent 3 years renovating it. The house is beautifully restored and has a lot of original detail.
We arrived at the hotel around 12:30 and checked in. Our room wasn’t ready but they made us a welcome cocktail and set us up in front of the fire place in the living room area of the lobby. The cocktail was called Be Our Guest and was delicious and had local Catskill rye whiskey and apple cider (among other things). We ordered lunch and then relaxed in front of the fire and played a game of rummikub. We’ve both been off from work all month, but this may have been the first time in four weeks that we actually felt stress-free. Also, I won!
This is Tzvi after he has lost at Rummikub
For lunch I had a niçoise salad and Tzvi had a smoked trout sandwich on really thick sourdough bread. Apparently Sullivan County is the trout capital of the US. Both were great and they brought us the food in the living room, so we didn’t need to move and could continue enjoying our seat and our game.
Our room was ready so we went up and got settled. We had booked a lake-view king which had a huge soaking tub and separate shower.
We unpacked a little and then changed into bathing suits and bathrobes and walked up to the spa, which is in a separate building just up a small hill. The spa has a big relaxation area that was kind of like a huge greenhouse heated by an outdoor fireplace. There was also a hot tub and a sauna. Being in the hot tub while it was snowing was great.
When the bubbles turn off and it’s too cold to walk back to the button.
One thing we didn’t think about was how much more snow they get upstate than on Long Island. When we left home there was still snow on the ground, but we had moved past boots weather, so we didn’t even think to bring our snow boots with us. That was a bit of a mistake since there was a lot more snow and slush on the ground up here. Tzvi actually slipped and fell walking from the car because it was so slushy. That and we’re old now.
After relaxing a bit it was time for massages. Because of Covid and distancing they don’t do couples massages right now, but we went back to back. Our massages were great, but it was a little uncomfortable wearing the mask face down in the table. They also put an extra pillowcase over the headrest as an extra “mask.” No one suffocated and the massage was wonderful. It was like she was so intentional, really finding the bad spots. Or maybe they were just easy to find because there were so many of them.
Around 6pm we went back to our room and got ready for dinner. There’s no TV in the room, which is fine since, when we got bored of each other, we still had our iPhones, iPads and laptops, though it was the first time we stayed somewhere without a TV.
Dinner was in the dining room at 7:30pm. There were only four rooms filled for the night and by the time we got to dinner there were only two other tables and one left quickly after we sat down. It was also a pretty big room and very spaced out. We started by ordering cocktails - Tzvi had a drink with Jamaican rum and I had one with gin and egg white and grated freeze dried raspberry on top. I think it was the first time I’ve had a drink with egg white; it still weirds me out, but it was a very tasty drink. The bartender was very friendly and I felt bad that we didn’t order more drinks, but one was more than enough.
To start I had a caesar salad and Tzvi had an iceberg wedge with smoky blue cheese dressing. For the main, there wasn’t much on the menu that I would eat; the only thing that got close to being edible was the Parisian gnocchi, but that came with scallops and truffles and a mushroom cream sauce. Luckily they made it for me without everything and sautéed in butter and oil. So basically I got 10 pieces of plain Gnocchi, but it was good. Tzvi, on the other hand, had a massive piece of dover sole meunière that looked like a vagina. I actually tried the fish, even though I don’t usually eat sole, and it was actually edible (which is really saying something for me considering I usually won’t touch anything that’s not salmon or tuna). Tzvi loved it and ate almost the whole thing, even though we think it may have been a dish for two. We also got sides of Brussels sprouts and potato puree. The potato ended up being super creamy - like you have to eat it with a spoon because it goes right through the fork creamy - so Tzvi ate the entire thing himself and loved it. They also gave us warm popovers, which had gruyere cheese, though I didn’t taste the cheese. It made me miss the Popover Cafe that was on the UWS and closed years ago. Anyway they were really good.
We were pretty full after that, but we couldn’t decide on which dessert to get so we ordered all three on the menu. Also, because we are shameless. The three desserts were a chocolate mousse, crème brûlée and a crepe soufflé. They were all delicious. My favorite was the mousse - it was thick and rich (yeah, I like my chocolate mouse like I like my men). Tzvi’s favorite was the crepe soufflé, which was warm, fluffy and airy and was bathed in a sweet but tangy mango puree.
After dinner we played several games of tic-tac-toe in the lobby and then went back to the room. One thing about the hotel is that it really is an old house and the walls seem to be pretty thin. It wasn’t too noisy when we were in our room (we did hear people on the steps going by), but walking the hallways you can hear pretty clearly into rooms. As we went back to our room we could hear the people across the hall ‘enjoying each other’s company.’ Once back in our room we took a bath in the soaking tub. Great bathtub.
Good night.
I woke up too early on Wednesday morning. Why? Because my body hates me. I actually got up at 6:58 am. No crying Madeleine or climbing Hallie. Just me. I don’t know what I did to my internal clock to piss it off so much.
Anyway, we stayed in bed for a while and then got up and went to breakfast around 9:30am. We saw the couple from across the hall when we came in (they looked ‘well rested’), but they left soon after that. It’s weird how ‘back in the day,’ one would feel uncomfortable eating in a restaurant alone, but now it’s ideal.
We both had coffee and eggs, and then, because as I already said, we’re shameless, we ordered pancakes “for the table” (which doesn’t mean much when it’s just the two of us at the table). Everything was delicious, especially the pancakes which were crispy and buttery and came with a dollop of apple sauce and a local maple syrup.
We sat for a while and then went back to the room to pack up. Then we loaded the car and left around 11am, stopped at Woodbury Commons, and came home.
Great 24 hours. If you’re looking for a close getaway to just totally relax and unwind, we highly recommend Kenoza Hall.