Steph in Israel. Day 1. Welcome to Israel.

Hello everyone! For those of you who are unaware (or are too busy with your own lives to follow the minutia of mine), I am currently traveling for work to the holy land of Israel. I work for a little organization called Jewish National Fund (people know us for planting trees, but we do a LOT more than that ­- if you’d like to know more you should probably come to our FREE breakfast at Congregation Beth Sholom on Sunday November 11th to hear from Alan Dershowitz and Ben Brafman (shameless plug)). ANYWAY, one of the things I do is recruit for the Alexander Muss High School in Israel, a school where students in 10th-12th grades can come spend either 8 or 18 weeks in Israel, doing Israel studies AND their general studies. Yes, it’s pretty great, and yes I’m happy to tell you more. SO, I’m here for the week to see for myself what happens at the school (as it’s hard to recruit for something you haven’t seen), and then I’m bringing a group of students home on Thursday night.

Now that that’s out of the way, here we go. Thursday morning I dropped of Hallie at school. She was less sad than I was at our parting. Then I went home and said goodbye to TV, who was equally sad. So, then I had the rest of the day to finish packing and get last minute errands done. When I told a couple of people that I was leaving to Israel that night, they told me to “stay safe” really sincerely. Funny (well not funny) thing is, everyone back home should stay safe. I’m probably safer here. So, I finished up and headed to the airport at 5ish. The Uber was fine and check in was no big deal. At the counter, the woman saw that I had ordered the kids meal.  “Smart choice,” she said. I nodded. At security I forgot to take out my laptop and tablet (along with about 40 percent of others). I think having pre-check for so long just made me not think about anything. Oh well. After that, I walked to the gate and passed a Dylan’s Candy Bar. Being that I have no willpower, I walked in and bought myself candy, but not just candy, Reeses Pieces! You know why? Because I could, without having to worry about anyone else dying. Hooray! Once I got to the gate I saw people already lined up, but there was no way I was doing that. Again, I was on my own, and I was in no rush to get on that plane early. Instead, I spent 10 minutes doing a Pelton stretching video and looking like a fool, but hey, I had 10 hours on a plane coming up.

Finally I boarded and settled into seat 25K, an El Al economy plus window seat, which means it was a standard airline seat and probably less legroom than JetBlue. I had a middle aged Israeli couple next to me. They held hands a lot and it was cute. It made me miss Mr Tzvi. We taxied for a LONG time. Our departure was 7:30 and we didn’t take off until 8:45. During this time I video chatted with Hallie and Tzvi, so basically from the time she was in bath until she went to sleep, and then even after that. All of a sudden we were going really fast and we were STILL video chatting so I was like, “I think I need to hang up now,” and then we were in the air. Right as we got up I got SUPER bloated, and remained that way the ENTIRE FLIGHT. It was miserable. So uncomfortable. Didn’t stop me from eating some of my kids meal though (3 chicken nuggets). I watched some of a movie with Mila Kunis and Kate Mkinnon, and then listened to a few soundtracks, watched some of Designated Survivor, and tried to sleep. I definitely slept through a few songs, but not much. Breakfast was fine; the kids meal was much better that the regular meal. I got strawberry yogurt, pancakes with that appley filling, chocolate milk, a weird pastry, and I think that’s it. I had a few bites. We finally landed at 12:30 Israel time.

I got off the plane and headed to customs. The passport control lady asked me zero questions, and actually didn’t speak to me at all. She was complaining to her friend in the next cubicle about her friend who was on a bathroom break and not coming back fast enough. So, she said nothing to me and just let me in the country. At baggage claim I was surprised that you now have to pay 10 shekels for a cart! You used to get all the carts for free! I guess they wised up. I still bought one. After that I went to the taxi stand where I got a slip that said I was going to Jerusalem. I asked if they take credit card and the man said yes, and if the guy says his machine is broken then just don’t pay. I could do that, right? So I got in a cab and made my way to Jerusalem. OBVIOUSLY once we pulled up he said he didn’t even HAVE a credit card machine. He was apologetic, and didn’t seem like he was screwing me, and said the guy at the airport shouldn’t have said that everyone has one. So, the driver first took me to a gas station which he said would have an atm (it didn’t), then we went to random stores and found an ATM machine which didn’t work. Finally I called Abby (my host) who paid for me. I need to pay her back.

For Shabbat I stayed at the Kehats, old family friends who we’ve stayed with many times. I got in and made myself comfortable. The Kehats have 4 kids, all who are still in the army, even though they’ve completed their mandatory service. They are also all very smart. One of them is currently like the number 3 in the intelligence brigade or something. He basically knows EVERYTHING regarding security, and I mean everything. Unfortunately he wasn’t home for Shabbat. But, Roni (my age) and Avri (younger but I forget by how much) were home. When  I walked in Roni was trying to make a mayonnaise recipe that their chef cousin Josh had given them. I’m not lying when I say from when I got there (2:30) until I think 3:30 she was trying to make that mayo. It was hilarious. It wasn’t whipping up. Eventually she gave up and used regular mayo. Anyway, I showered and got ready for Shabbat which was technically at 4:15 Jerusalem time, but they said they went by Tel Aviv time plus 18 minutes. My kind of people.

After we got ready for Shabbat I realized that Roni and Mordy we’re going to shul, so I decided to join them. I’d been there before, it was actually right across the street from where we stayed for a month back in 2010. When we got there I spotted Marc Friedman, a guy I’d been friends with in high school and who is now married to Carly Rothenberg. Funny. Shul was nice, I almost fell asleep. 

Shabbat was lovely. We ate shabbat dinner and I was passing out, but I made it until 9:30ish. Abby insisted on giving me Melatonin to sleep through the night. (Drugs! I took drugs!) And it was fabulous. I woke up briefly at 4:30 but then slept until 10:30. I don’t think I’ve slept until 10:30 in 3 years. I was still so bloated though. At 4:30 am I had to take off my rings because my tree stump fingers couldn’t handle them. Though, when I woke up I felt a little better. Anyway, after I woke up at 10:30 I spent 3 hours reading Busy Phillips’ new memoir. It was a great morning. We had lunch, and hung around. Their chef cousin Josh came over in the afternoon (who I also know for many years) and we hung out, played Code Names, and before we knew it Shabbat was over. Roni left for a friend in Modiin and Josh and I decided to go to the Tachana Rishona – the first station -  a nice area with restaurants and shops near the first train station in Jerusalem. We ate at Miznon. We split a soba noodle salmon dish and then got three desserts: crème brulee, chocolate crème brulee, and lemon tart. All good, but the chocolate crème brulee tasted more like a flourless chocolate cake. I didn’t mention that Josh has been a chef at Jacko Street (a great Jerusalem restaurant) but recently quit and is starting on Monday at some fancy Asian place in Tel Aviv. He is also in school for restaurant management. He wants to own a restaurant one day.

I got back to Abby’s at about 9:30 and grabbed a cab to Hod Hasharon, where the AMHSI campus is and where I will be staying for the rest of the week. Its near Tel Aviv and was about an hour drive. I was met by Aviv, one of the Madrichim, who showed me to my room. It’s a nice room, with a bed, bathroom, and little kitchenette. I unpacked and did a solid 10 minutes of exercise to try and relieve my bloating. It didn’t work. Aviv told me I have to be awake at 6:45, and I have to video chat Hallie at 12:45, so I’ll have a nice 5.5 hours of sleep. Isn’t that GREAT? Oh well. I’ll be tired. And bloated.

Until tomorrow!